Parlay: Atlanta Hawks VS Boston Celtics 2025-07-20

Atlanta Hawks vs. Boston Celtics: A Summer League Showdown Where the Odds Are as Clear as a Heatwave in Vegas

Ladies and gentlemen, buckle up for a Summer League clash that’s less “March Madness” and more “July Meltdown.” The Atlanta Hawks (4-0) roll into Las Vegas as the undefeated kings of this year’s NBA Summer League, while the Boston Celtics (3-1) aim to crown themselves in their final tune-up. Let’s break this down with the precision of a point guard reading a zone defense—and the humor of a comedian trapped in a halftime interview.

Parsing the Odds: Why the Hawks Are the Favorite, But Don’t Bet Your Shoelaces
The Hawks are listed at -3.5-point favorites across all major books, with moneyline odds hovering around 1.56 (decimal), implying a 64% implied probability of victory. For context, that’s about the same chance I have of surviving a buffet line without eating dessert first. The Celtics, meanwhile, sit at +2.4 (decimal), or roughly 40% implied probability, which is about what your couch has of surviving your New Year’s fitness resolution.

The total is set at 185.5 points, with both Over and Under priced at -110 (decimal 1.91). Given the Hawks’ 4-0 slate (scoring 98.3 PPG) and the Celtics’ 3-1 record (94.1 PPG), this feels like a “high-scoring” game only if your definition of “high” is “enough to make a 12-year-old gasp.” The Hawks’ offense, led by Kobe Bufkin’s 19.5 PPG and Asa Newell’s 13.5 PPG/8.3 RPG, is as reliable as a microwave. The Celtics’ Jordan Walsh (15.0 PPG) and Hugo Gonzalez (11.7 PPG, 37.5% 3PT) add some zip, but Boston’s absence of center Charles Bassey (due to “prior commitments”—read: avoiding this game like it’s a tax audit) leaves a hole in their interior defense.

Digesting the News: Injuries, Absences, and Why Your Couch Is Winning
The Hawks are as healthy as a vegan at a salad bar. Their undefeated streak? A masterclass in “let the rookie cook.” Bufkin, the human highlight reel, has been so dominant, he’s already trending on TikTok under the hashtag #Kobe23Point5. Newell’s rebounding? So efficient, he’s basically a trash can with a pulse.

The Celtics, meanwhile, are playing without Bassey, their 7’0” anchor, who’s “prior commitments” likely involve binge-watching The Sopranos and avoiding existential dread. Without him, Boston’s defense looks like a sieve that’s been challenged by a sieve convention. Their hope rests on wings like Jordan Walsh (a scorer with the accuracy of a sprinkler in a hurricane) and Kenneth Lofton Jr., who’s trying to prove he’s more than “that guy who looks like Jalen Suggs but with better hair.”

The Humor: Because Sports Analysis Needs More Puns
Let’s be real: The Hawks are the espresso machine of this matchup—small, caffeinated, and ready to burn through the Celtics’ defense like it’s a coupon for free coffee. The Celtics? They’re the “I’ll just have water” of this game. Sure, water’s hydrating, but it’s not going to win you a Summer League title.

Boston’s 37.5% 3PT shooting from Gonzalez is about as reliable as a weather forecast in the Sahara. And their spread of -3.5? That’s the difference between “we’re winning” and “we’re winning, but not enough to make our GM cry happy tears.”

Same-Game Parlay Pick: Hawks -3.5 & Over 185.5
Why it works:
- The Hawks’ offense is too hot to handle, and the Celtics’ defense is too porous to stop a leaky faucet, let alone a 19.5 PPG scorer.
- With both teams averaging ~98 PPG combined, the Over 185.5 feels like a “give me a break” line. It’s 2025, not 1929—basketballs don’t bounce that slow.

Implied probability of this parlay: ~25% (Hawks -3.5: 54%, Over 185.5: 47%, combined ~25%). The payout? ~10:1 (decimal 11.0), which is better than your odds of finding a parking spot near the Thomas & Mack Center.

Prediction: Hawks Win, But Don’t Celebrate Too Hard
The Hawks will win this by a nose—maybe 88-85—and fans will leave thinking, “That was fun, but I’d rather watch paint dry.” The Celtics, meanwhile, will go home wondering if “prior commitments” includes a side hustle as a motivational speaker for teams with no chance.

Final Score Prediction: Atlanta Hawks 92, Boston Celtics 87
Parlay Verdict: Cash in on the Hawks -3.5 and Over 185.5. If it tanks, at least you’ll have a story for the bar. If it hits? Congratulate yourself for not betting on the Celtics’ “mystery” absence.

Created: July 20, 2025, 8:10 a.m. GMT