Parlay: New Orleans Pelicans VS Orlando Magic 2025-10-16

New Orleans Pelicans vs. Orlando Magic: The Preseason’s Most Annoying Parlay
Where injuries, youth, and over/under lines collide like a Google Home vs. Alexa fight

1. Parse the Odds: Who’s the Favorite, and Why?
Let’s cut to the chase: The Orlando Magic are the consensus favorite here, with decimal odds hovering around 1.33-1.34 (implied probability: ~75-76%). The New Orleans Pelicans, meanwhile, are priced at 3.25-3.50 (implied probability: ~23-25%), which is basically the sportsbook’s way of saying, “We think Zion Williamson’s team is a 23% shot to not embarrass themselves.” The spread? Magic are -7.5, which feels like the NBA’s way of saying, “Yeah, we know the Pelicans are cursed, but let’s not make it too easy for Orlando.”

The total is set between 229.5-230.5 points, which is oddly high for a preseason game. But hey, when Zion’s dropping 20 and Paolo Banchero’s throwing down dunks like they’re free samples at a snack aisle, you kinda expect a popcorn-score frenzy.

2. Digest the News: Injuries, Bench Depth, and Why the Pelicans Should’ve Just Stayed in Australia
The Pelicans’ biggest problem isn’t Zion’s occasional knee issues or their “curse” (more on that later)—it’s Kevon Looney’s tibiofibular ligament sprain. For the uninitiated, that’s a fancy way of saying, “Your center just sprained his shin-knee connector and will miss weeks.” Looney’s absence forces Yves Missi (last year’s All-Rookie Team center) into a starting role. Missi’s a solid bet, but let’s be real: The Pelicans’ frontcourt just became “Zion, Jordan Poole, and a guy named Yves who’s basically playing 7th-grade basketball against grown men.”

Meanwhile, the Magic have been a preseason perfect 3-0, outscoring opponents by an average of 17 points. Franz Wagner’s been a scoring machine (17 PPG in 16 minutes—yes, minutes), and Wendell Carter Jr. and Paolo Banchero have combined for 33 points and 13 rebounds in their last game. Oh, and their bench? Jordan Hawkins, Saddiq Bey, and Jeremiah Fears dropped 49 points against the Rockets. The Magic’s depth is so absurd, they could play a full game with their practice squad and still win.

As for the Pelicans’ “injury curse”? Former player Dyson Daniels once called the franchise “cursed,” and honestly? He’s not wrong. Zion’s missed 53% of his career games since entering the league. It’s like they have a “Broken Toy” sticker on their roster.

3. Humorous Spin: Why This Game Feels Like a Netflix Reality Show
- The Pelicans’ Bench: It’s not a bench—it’s a buffet of scorers. Jordan Poole, Trey Murphy III, and Jordan Hawkins look like they’re here to play and audition for The Great British Bake Off. “Sorry, I’ll take ‘Double Figure Scorers’ for $500, Alex.”
- The Magic’s Defense: They’ve allowed just 108 PPG in the preseason. That’s the NBA equivalent of a toddler learning to count. “One, two, three… wait, who’s winning?”
- The Spread (-7.5): Orlando’s basically being asked to win by “at least the number of points Zion would score in a casual game of H-O-R-S-E.”

4. Prediction & Parlay: Bet Like You’re Trying to Annoy the Sportsbook
Same-Game Parlay Pick:
- Orlando Magic to Win (-7.5)
- Total Points Over 229.5

Why?
- The Magic’s offense is a well-oiled machine, and their defense isn’t so bad it’ll make you cry. With Franz Wagner scoring like a caffeinated espresso shot and the Pelicans’ frontcourt in shambles, covering -7.5 is plausible.
- The over on points? Both teams have young, hungry rosters that’ll play fast. The Pelicans’ bench is a scoring tsunami, and the Magic’s starters won’t exactly be holding back.

Implied Probability Check:
- Magic to win (-7.5) has implied odds of ~55% (based on spread lines).
- Over 229.5 is ~50% (even money).
Combined, this parlay has a ~27% chance of hitting (55% * 50%). Given the Magic’s dominance and the Pelicans’ chaos, it’s a smart, slightly sadistic bet.

Final Verdict:
The Magic are the preseason kings, and the Pelicans are the court jester—minus the jester’s actual jester hat. Take Orlando to win and cover, and throw in the over because someone has to explain to the sportsbook why they’re paying out on a 230-point game. As for the Pelicans? They’ll probably lose by 10 and make us all question why Zion’s team can’t just be good.

Bet responsibly, and if you lose, blame the “curse.” It’s not a real thing… probably. 🏀✨

Created: Oct. 16, 2025, 5:08 p.m. GMT