Parlay: Washington Wizards VS Philadelphia 76ers 2025-12-02

Philadelphia 76ers vs. Washington Wizards: A Tale of Two Teams (One’s a Tank, the Other’s a Submarine)

Odds Breakdown: The 76ers Are Here to Win, the Wizards Are Here to… Exist?
The Philadelphia 76ers (-13.5) are a near-untouchable favorite against the Washington Wizards, with implied probabilities of 89% (based on -1300+ odds across books) to win outright. Their -13 scoring differential and the Wizards’ -270 (!) paint a stark picture: Philly is a submarine; Washington is a leaky raft. The over/under sits at 235.5, with the 76ers averaging 2.6 points over their total and the Wizards averaging 1.3 under. But with Washington’s defense allowing 127.6 PPG (NBA-worst), this game could be a popcorn contest.

Injury Montage: The 76ers’ Absurd Misfortune
Philadelphia’s injury report reads like a horror movie: Joel Embiid (knee, out), Kelly Oubre Jr. (knee, out), Andre Drummond (knee, day-to-day), and Paul George (knee/back, questionable). It’s like a knee-themed support group crashed their locker room. Drummond, their 7’1” rim-protector, is “day-to-day” with a sprained knee. Meanwhile, the Wizards’ Alex Sarr (adductor, day-to-day) and CJ McCollum (healthy but statistically irrelevant) are Washington’s faintest hopes. The 76ers’ home court? A paradox: They score 2.6 fewer points at home but allow 4.2 more. It’s like hosting a BBQ where your guests bring both the meat and the fire extinguisher.

Same-Game Parlay Pick: 76ers -13.5 AND Over 235.5
Why? The 76ers’ offense, led by Tyrese Maxey’s 32.3 PPG (he’s scored 28+ in 6 of his last 10 games), should torch a Wizards defense that’s as porous as a colander. Maxey’s 3.7 3PM per game? Washington’s allowing 40.6% 3-point shooting this season. For the Over, the Wizards’ 127.6 PPG allowed and Philly’s 118.8 PPG scored combine for a total that’ll likely eclipse 235.5. Even with Embiid out, Maxey and company should keep the pedal to the metal, while Washington’s offense (113.4 PPG) will sputter but not die.

Humor: The Absurdity of It All
- Joel Embiid’s Knee: It’s had more drama than a Netflix series. He’s out again, but not before logging 30 minutes in a double-overtime loss. If his knee were a person, it’d have a restraining order.
- Washington’s Defense: They’re so bad, even the Atlanta Hawks’ offense (which scored 142 on Philly) would feel bad exploiting them.
- Alex Sarr’s Adductor: The Wizards’ lone bright spot (a 19.1 PPG rookie) is day-to-day. It’s like your star striker for a soccer match is “day-to-day” with cramps from jogging.

Prediction: 76ers 128, Wizards 112
Philly’s depth (despite injuries) and Washington’s defensive incompetence make this a near-lock. Maxey drops 35, the 76ers hit 12 3s, and the Wizards’ “offense” consists of CJ McCollum chucking bricks and Alex Sarr wincing at his adductor. The Over hits because Washington’s gonna score, and Philly’s gonna let them. The spread? Philly wins by 16, because math.

Final Thought: Bet the 76ers -13.5 and Over 235.5 at +280 (DraftKings). It’s a mismatch made in heaven for parlay lovers. Unless Washington’s roster collectively invents the wheel, this is a done deal. And if they do invent the wheel? They’ll probably lose 130-110 anyway.

Created: Dec. 2, 2025, 12:52 p.m. GMT