Parlay: Worcester Red Sox VS St. Paul Saints 2025-07-24
The St. Paul Saints vs. Worcester Red Sox: A Rainout Redemption Special
Where the only thing more chaotic than the weather is the betting lines.
Parse the Odds: A Tale of Two Pitchers and a Rainout Curse
Let’s start with the numbers. The Worcester Red Sox are the slight moneyline favorites at -113 (decimal: ~1.82), while the St. Paul Saints sit at +110 (decimal: ~1.93). Converting to implied probabilities: Worcester checks in at 52.4% to win, and St. Paul at 47.6%. Not a massive gap, but enough to suggest the market trusts Worcester’s starting pitching—if they don’t implode.
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The spread tells a trickier story. Worcester is favored by 1.5 runs (-1.5, +210), while St. Paul is +1.5 (-250). The Saints’ implied probability to cover the spread? A hefty 60%, which feels generous given their 5.17 ERA starter, Darren McCaughan, who’s like a toaster with a 5.17% chance of sparking a fire. Meanwhile, Worcester’s Cooper Criswell (3.62 ERA) is the financial advisor of pitchers—stable, reliable, and not likely to blow your budget.
Totals are split: Over 8.5 runs at -113 and Under 9.0 at -113. The market’s saying “I have no idea,” but given McCaughan vs. Criswell, this feels like a low-scoring duel unless St. Paul’s bench goes on a 9th-inning tear.
Digest the News: Rain, Rain, Go Away… But Come Back with a Doubleheader
The Saints have been rained out 14 times this season—a record so absurd, even the clouds are filing a restraining order. Their doubleheader redemption tour features Darren McCaughan, who’s 5-3 but with a 5.17 ERA. Imagine a guy who’s “okay at his job” but still gets promoted. Opposing him is Worcester’s Cooper Criswell (3.62 ERA), who’s basically the anti-McCaughan: reliable, unexciting, and probably owns a spreadsheet titled “How to Not Lose Games.”
The second game of the doubleheader pits Pierson Ohl (3.44 ERA) against Isaac Coffey (6.56 ERA). Coffey is the baseball equivalent of a “mystery meat” hot dog—low quality, high risk. If this game goes late, expect a mercy rule or a Coffey-induced meltdown.
Humorous Spin: Baseball’s Version of a Split Bill
St. Paul’s 14 rainouts this season are enough to make a weatherman quit. They’ve had more days off than a college student in January. Their fans? A mix of die-hards and people who bought tickets for the “2025 exchange” just to avoid awkward small talk.
Worcester’s Criswell, meanwhile, is the “I’ll just keep pitching until someone else screws up” type. He’s not flashy, but he’s the guy who’d win a “Most Likely to Avoid Embarrassment” award at a pitcher’s funeral.
And let’s not forget the doubleheader. This isn’t a game—it’s a marathon for the soul. Fans who bought tickets in person? They’re already plotting how to redeem their vouchers for next year’s “We Promise the Sky Will Stay Clear” season.
Prediction: The Parlay Playbook
For your same-game parlay, stack Worcester -1.5 and Under 9.0 runs. Here’s why:
1. Worcester -1.5: Criswell’s 3.62 ERA vs. McCaughan’s 5.17 is a mismatch. The Red Sox should win by enough to cover.
2. Under 9.0 runs: Both starters are mid-rotation types who prioritize “not blowing it” over no-homers. With a doubleheader ahead, neither team will have the energy to ignite a 15-run frenzy.
Implied probability of this parlay: Worcester (-1.5) at 43.8% + Under 9.0 at 52.4% = 22.9% chance (odds ~4.36x). Not a sure thing, but better than betting on McCaughan to throw a shutout.
Final Verdict: Worcester wins Game 1, 4-2. Game 2 is a Coffey disaster, but that’s a story for another day. For now, lay the -1.5 on Worcester and pray for a dry forecast. After all, the only thing worse than a rainout is a rainout and a blown parlay.
“The Saints may have been rained out 14 times, but they’ll never be rained in—that’s what umbrellas are for.” 🌧️⚾
Created: July 24, 2025, 5 p.m. GMT