Prediction: Calgary Flames VS Utah Mammoth 2025-10-15
Calgary Flames vs. Utah Mammoth: A Tale of Third-Period Torment and Cooley’s Curse
The Calgary Flames, fresh off a third-period collapse that would make a Jell-O mold weep, head to Salt Lake City to face the Utah Mammoth. With the Flames nursing a 1-3 record and a habit of surrendering goals like a toddler hands out cookies, this game feels like a setup for a punchline. But let’s break it down with the precision of a Zamboni operator on a caffeine high.
Odds & Implied Probabilities
The Mammoth are favored at -219 (68.6% implied probability), while the Flames sit at +180 (35.7%). The over/under is 6 goals, and with Calgary’s third-period struggles (they’ve been outscored 6-2 in the final frame this season), betting the over feels like predicting rain in a leaky boat. The key stat? The Flames’ netminder, Devin Cooley, hasn’t played an NHL game since April 2024 and carries a career .870 save percentage—worse than a sieve full of sieve. For context, that’s the kind of save percentage that would make a beach volleyball net blush.
Team News & Greasy Goals
Utah’s coach, André Tourigny, is begging for “greasy” goals—think rebounds, deflections, and pucks that bounce off the back of a player’s jersey like a cosmic joke. Last season, the Mammoth scored 240 goals; this year, they’re still scoring, just… slower. Their defense, however, is tighter than a goalie’s grip on a playoff dream. Meanwhile, Calgary’s power play—21% last season—is now a ghost of its former self, with Backlund’s highlight-reel give-and-go against Vegas feeling like ancient history.
The Flames’ biggest issue? Their third-period ineptitude. They’ve allowed 6 goals in the final frame this season, which is about as effective as a screen door in a hurricane. And let’s not forget the back-to-back travel nightmare: Utah’s players are sipping coffee in Salt Lake, while Calgary’s squad is probably still on the tarmac, debating whether jet lag or jet fatigue is the better excuse.
The Cooley Conundrum
Here’s where it gets absurd: Flames’ goalie Devin Cooley hasn’t played an NHL game in over a year, and his career GAA of 4.98 is so bad it makes a leaky sprinkler system look elite. To add insult to injury, Utah’s Logan Cooley (no relation, per the AP) might score a “Cooley-on-Cooley” goal, a family feud turned hockey highlight. Imagine the ESPN graphic: “COOLEY V. COOLEY: THE SIEGE OF SALT LAKE.”
Humorously Yours
The Flames’ defense is like a toddler in a candy store—enthusiastic, chaotic, and destined to make a mess. Their third-period woes? That’s the hockey equivalent of ordering a salad and accidentally eating the entire buffet. As for Utah’s “greasy” goals, Tourigny’s team needs to embrace the filth—think of it as hockey’s version of eating messy tacos: messy, unpredictable, and occasionally glorious.
Prediction
The Mammoth’s improved defense, better rest, and Calgary’s Cooley-induced goaltending crisis paint a bleak picture for the Flames. While the Flames’ power play might flicker (21% isn’t nothing), their third-period meltdowns and Dustin Wolf’s absence (replaced by a man with a GAA that could double as a lava lamp) make this a Utah-friendly bounce house.
Final Verdict: Bet the Mammoth. Unless you enjoy watching the Flames turn a 2-1 lead into a 4-2 loss while Cooley stares at the puck like it’s a math test. Utah wins 4-2, with a Cooley-on-Cooley goal that no one sees coming—because in hockey, the greasiest goals are the ones you don’t see coming.
Game on Wednesday, October 16. May the sieve have mercy. 🏀🥅
Created: Oct. 15, 2025, 1:58 p.m. GMT