Prediction: Chattanooga Mocs VS Bellarmine Knights 2025-12-17

Bellarmine Knights vs. Chattanooga Mocs: A Statistical Slapstick Showdown

Parse the Odds: The Numbers Don’t Lie (Unless They’re on a Spreadsheet)
Let’s cut to the chase: Bellarmine is the favorite in this matchup with the statistical confidence of a mathematician explaining why 2+2=4 to a toddler. The Knights are priced at decimal odds of ~1.02 (implied probability: ~98%) across bookmakers, while Chattanooga is a 17.0 underdog (implied probability: ~5.8%). If you’re betting on Chattanooga, you might as well buy a lottery ticket and a vowel—same odds, less excitement.

The spread tells the story too: Bellarmine is favored by 9.5 points, per most books, meaning they’re expected to win by nearly a full game. For context, this is like betting your neighbor’s cat will finally learn to use the scratching post. It’s inevitable.

Statistically, Bellarmine’s 51.8% field goal shooting is a staggering 10.1 percentage points better than the average of Chattanooga’s opponents. The Mocs, meanwhile, average 11.3 three-pointers per game, but Bellarmine allows just 9.5—a defensive wall that makes Chattanooga’s sharpshooters look like they’re shooting at a brick wall (which, honestly, is more accurate than their current strategy).

Digest the News: Injuries, Road Struggles, and One Very Confused Offense
Recent news isn’t kind to the Mocs. Their star, Jordan Frison, dropped 20 points in a 92-78 loss to Auburn, which is like scoring 20 in a grocery store during a Black Friday sale—you’re impressive, but the game’s already over. Frison averages 13.5 PPG, but even his 37.2% three-point shooting won’t save a team that’s 1-3 on the road.

Bellarmine, meanwhile, leans on Jack Karasinski, who drops 20.9 PPG while draining 37.2% from deep. His teammate, Brian Waddell, shoots 64.8% from the field, which is so efficient it makes a vending machine look jealous. The Knights’ home record is just 2-2, but let’s be real: They’re not struggling; they’re just politely testing their fans’ patience before the real show begins.

Humorous Spin: When Physics and Puns Collide
Imagine Bellarmine’s offense as a well-oiled rocket ship and Chattanooga’s defense as a toddler trying to block it with a stuffed animal. The Mocs’ three-point reliance is like asking a penguin to play beach volleyball—adorable, but not a recipe for victory. Bellarmine’s field goal efficiency? That’s the kind of shooting that makes NBA teams text their agents to negotiate better contracts.

The spread of -9.5? Bellarmine could sleepwalk through this game and still win by the same margin. As for Chattanooga… well, their road struggles are so legendary, they’ve considered changing their name to “The Lost.”

Prediction: The Verdict is In, and It’s Not Close
Bellarmine’s 51.8% FG shooting versus Chattanooga’s 41.7% defensive average is a statistical yawn-fest in the Mocs’ favor. Unless Frison turns into a human cannonball of threes (and even then), this game is as predictable as a clock striking noon.

Final Verdict: Bellarmine wins 85-70, covering the spread with the ease of a professor acing their own exam. Bet on the Knights, unless you enjoy the thrill of watching a train wreck… in which case, buy in for the second half.

“The only thing more certain than this outcome is gravity—and even gravity takes a lunch break sometimes.”

Created: Dec. 18, 2025, 1:48 a.m. GMT

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