Prediction: Cincinnati Bengals VS Baltimore Ravens 2025-11-27
Bengals vs. Ravens: A Thanksgiving Turkey Troop with a Side of Sausage
The Cincinnati Bengals (3-8) and Baltimore Ravens (6-5) collide on Thanksgiving night in a matchup thatâs less âgratitudeâ and more âgrimace.â Letâs break this down with the precision of a pro linebacker and the humor of a turkey trying to play football.
The Odds: A Math Class You Canât Skip
The Ravens are favored by 7 points (-7, -110), with implied probabilities suggesting theyâre the statistical darlings here. For context, thatâs like betting on a rooster to lay an egg versus a henâsure, the rooster could pull it off, but donât bet your grandmaâs pie crust on it. The over/under is 51.5 points, which sounds festive but might be optimistic. The Bengals rank dead last in total defense (415.8 yards/game) and scoring defense (32.7 points/game). If their defense were a Thanksgiving side dish, itâd be the Jell-O that somehow defies gravity and tackles you.
Injury Report: The Bengalsâ âWhoâs Who of Absencesâ
Cincinnatiâs roster looks like a âWhereâs Waldo?â book for missing stars. Wide receiver Tee Higgins (concussion) and defensive end Trey Hendrickson (hip) are out, leaving the Bengals with the offensive firepower of a soggy cranberry sauce. Even their return of JaâMarr Chase from suspension feels like trading a brand-new pie for a pie thatâs been dropped three times. On the bright side, Joe Burrowâs back from toe surgeryâbut letâs not forget heâs the guy who once tripped over his own shoelaces during a scramble. (Note to Burrow: Tie those laces. Higgins already did the âtrip and concussionâ bit this week.)
The Ravens: A Well-Oiled (Thanksgiving) Turkey
Baltimoreâs five-game winning streak is smoother than a gravy boat after Thanksgiving dinner. Lamar Jackson is throwing like a man whoâs been binge-watching highlight reels of his own careerâ15 touchdowns in eight starts, four turnovers. Meanwhile, Derrick Henry is one foot away from surpassing Jim Brown on the all-time rushing list. If Henry were a side dish, heâd be the mashed potatoes: relentless, ever-present, and capable of smothering any defense. The Ravensâ defense? Itâs the aunt who âaccidentallyâ eats all the pie and then judges you for having seconds. Theyâve allowed no more than 20 points in their last five games. Thatâs the NFL equivalent of a âlow-keyâ vibe.
Historical Context: A Feud Like No Other
These teams love a good thriller. Their matchups are often decided by less than a field goal, like a game of âhot potatoâ where the potato is a deflated football. But this year? The Ravens have the momentum of a Black Friday shopper at 5 a.m., while the Bengals are the guy still picking out a turkey at 10 a.m. on Thanksgiving.
Prediction: The Verdict (and a Side of Humor)
The Ravens are the clear pick here. Their defense will stifle the Bengalsâ porous offense like a lid on a soup pot, and Lamar Jackson will make the Bengalsâ secondary look as coordinated as a turkey in a wind tunnel. The Bengalsâ only hope is hoping the Ravensâ offense goes coldâwhich is as likely as your uncle remembering to take out the trash.
Final Score Prediction: Ravens 27, Bengals 17.
Bet on Baltimore unless you enjoy the cinematic tragedy of watching Burrow try to outrun his own mistakes. And remember, folks: This game isnât about football. Itâs about whoâs bringing the dessert. The Ravens? Theyâve already baked the pie. The Bengals? Still looking for the flour.
Created: Nov. 26, 2025, 4:49 p.m. GMT