Prediction: Houston Baptist Huskies VS Nebraska Cornhuskers 2025-09-13
Nebraska Cornhuskers vs. Houston Baptist Huskies: A Football "Kindergartener vs. the Pre-School Grad" Showdown
The Nebraska Cornhuskers (2-0), fresh off a performance so dominant they used 108 players in their last game (including a guy whose job description is “third-string waterboy with a megaphone”), face the Houston Baptist Huskies (1-1) in what promises to be a showcase of “Why did we buy tickets to watch a team practice?” The spread? Nebraska is a 44.5-point favorite, a line so steep it makes a skyscraper look like a speed bump. Let’s break this down with the precision of a spreadsheet and the humor of a dad joke.
Parse the Odds: A Math Class You’ll Actually Enjoy
The numbers scream “Nebraska’s gonna waltz,” and not the cute kind where both partners stay on their feet. The Cornhuskers’ offense, led by freshman QB Dylan Raiola (10th on Nebraska’s all-time passing list, which is like being the 10th-best at a family trivia night), ranks 9th in total passing EPA. Their running game? A well-oiled tank, with RB Emmett Johnson already notching three 100-yard games. Meanwhile, Houston Baptist’s offense, helmed by former SEC backup Jake Weir, ranks 67th in FCS in yards per game—which is college football’s version of a slow Wi-Fi connection.
Defensively, Nebraska is a Jekyll-and-Hyde act: 15th in EPA per pass play but 130th against the run. Good news for the Huskers: They’ll likely pass and run all over Houston Baptist, exploiting a defense that allowed 175 rushing yards to an NAIA team but just 65 to an FCS opponent. Confused? Don’t be—it’s like saying your toddler can’t eat cereal without spilling, but somehow devoured a whole cake.
The total points line sits at 54.5-55.5, with “Over” priced slightly lower (1.82-1.83 decimal odds). Given Nebraska’s offensive firepower and Houston Baptist’s defensive inconsistency, this feels like betting on whether a flamethrower will melt a tissue. Over is the logical pick, but we’re here to crown a winner, not play with fire.
Digest the News: Injuries, Depth, and “Why Are We Here?”
Nebraska’s depth chart reads like a Where’s Waldo? scavenger hunt—108 players used last week, with fourth-string QB TJ Lateef getting more playing time than most people get in a season. Coach Rhule’s strategy? Win early, rotate late, and treat this like a scrimmage against a team that exists. Houston Baptist, meanwhile, is the football equivalent of a group project: disorganized, underfunded, and asking, “Why are we doing this?”
Key news:
- Dylan Raiola is having a Heisman-worthy start (68.7% completion rate). Without him? Nebraska’s offense would be a car with no engine. With him? It’s a rocket ship.
- Houston Baptist’s rushing attack managed 175 yards against NAIA Arkansas Baptist but sputtered to 65 against FCS competition. That’s the football version of, “I can’t even.”
Humorous Spin: Absurdity Meets Analysis
Nebraska’s defense is like a bouncer at a VIP party—letting passes through the front door but tripping over its own feet if you try to sneak in the back. Their offense? A five-star chef who just discovered salt. Houston Baptist’s defense, meanwhile, is a sieve that’s been upgraded to a colander by a sadistic engineer.
The 44.5-point spread is so lopsided, it’s like betting on whether a professional wrestler will pin a kindergartener. Even if Nebraska’s starters sit at halftime, their backups could cover the spread by throwing dinks and dunks to the cheerleaders.
Prediction: The Verdict (Spoiler: Nebraska Wins)
Nebraska’s depth, offensive firepower, and Houston Baptist’s defensive ineptitude make this a no-brainer. The Cornhuskers will likely win 56-7 (per Sports Illustrated), using this game as a stress-free audition for their Big Ten showdown against Michigan.
Final Verdict: Bet Nebraska -44.5. If they don’t cover, check your TV—maybe you’re watching a replay of the 1980 U.S. hockey team.
As for Houston Baptist? They’ll go down in history as the team that made Nebraska’s waterboy question his life choices. Game on! 🏈
Created: Sept. 13, 2025, 1 p.m. GMT