Prediction: Indiana St Sycamores VS SIU-Edwardsville Cougars 2025-11-10
SIU-Edwardsville vs. Indiana State: A Tale of Sycamores, Sieves, and a Toaster in a Bakery
Ladies and gentlemen, grab your popcorn—this one’s a statistical circus. SIU-Edwardsville, fresh off a 77-60 drubbing of UTSA (thanks to Ring Malith’s 20-point performance), hosts Indiana State, a team that somehow averaged 15.2% of their points from the free-throw line last season. Wait, what? Is that a typo? No? Oh… that’s real? Well, congratulations, Indiana State. You’ve officially invented a new sport: Hoops Jenga, where you balance on a 30.3% three-point shooting percentage and hope the house of cards doesn’t collapse.
Parsing the Odds: Who’s the Favorite?
The books are in, and they’re as clear as Indiana State’s free-throw shooting. SIU-Edwardsville is the consensus pick at -444 implied odds (decimal 1.8), while Indiana State is a generous +205 (decimal 2.05). That’s like betting on a tortoise to beat a hare in a race, but the hare keeps tripping over its own shoelaces. The spread? SIU is favored by 1.5 to 2 points, which in basketball terms is about as stressful as betting your lunch money on a coin flip.
Team Breakdown: Sycamores vs. Sieve Defense
Let’s start with SIU-Edwardsville. They’re 2-0 this season, riding a 12-3 home record from last year and a defense that allows just 66.5 points per game. Their offense? A steady 71.6 PPG, which isn’t flashy but gets the job done like a reliable, if unexciting, toaster. Ring Malith’s 20-point explosion against UTSA? That’s the kind of performance that makes you think, “Ah, here’s a man who’s seen the kitchen and knows how the bread is baked.”
Now, Indiana State. You poor things. They’re 1-1 this season but brought the same offensive efficiency as a sieve at a bakery. Last year, they shot 30.7% from three and somehow averaged 80.1 points per game. How? Did they invent the 7-foot three-pointer? Their road record (4-9) and this season’s 1-11 home nightmare suggest they’re the NBA’s Charlotte Bobcats… but for college hoops. Oh, and that 15.2% free-throw “percentage”? Let’s assume that’s a typo for “points per game”—even that would mean they’re scoring 12 points at the line nightly. If true, their players should start a side hustle as professional trippers, because they’ve mastered the art of falling down.
The Humor: Why This Game is a Comedy of Errors
Indiana State’s three-point shooting is so bad, they’d make Steph Curry question his own existence. Their free-throw line? A mystery. Are they playing on a trampoline? Is the rim 15 feet high? SIU’s defense, meanwhile, is so disciplined, it makes a monk’s meditation routine look lax. If the Cougars’ defense had a LinkedIn profile, it’d say, “Specializing in making opponents feel obsolete since 2023.”
And let’s not forget the Sycamores’ road struggles. They’re like a tourist in a foreign country who only knows how to say “I don’t know” and “Where’s the nearest exit?” SIU’s home court is their version of a superhero’s secret lair—12-3 last season, baby!
Prediction: Who’s Cooking Tonight?
SIU-Edwardsville wins this by a comfortable margin. Indiana State’s shooting percentages are statistical anomalies, and the Cougars’ home-court advantage is a moat deeper than a duck’s bill. The total is set at 157.5, but SIU’s defense will likely keep this an “Under”—because even a bad team can’t shoot 157 points when the Sycamores’ offense is as dry as a forgotten wine cask.
Final Verdict: Bet on SIU-Edwardsville (-1.5 to -2.0) to win by 5-7 points. Unless Indiana State’s free-throw line is secretly a teleportation device, this one’s a rout.
Disclaimer: This analysis is not financial advice. If you bet on Indiana State, expect results similar to betting a snowman will win a sauna contest.
Created: Nov. 10, 2025, 3:10 p.m. GMT