Prediction: Montréal Canadiens VS Columbus Blue Jackets 2025-11-17
Columbus Blue Jackets vs. Montréal Canadiens: A Goalie’s Worst Nightmare
By Your Humble Sportswriter, Who Still Thinks the Zamboni is a Type of Sandwich
The Columbus Blue Jackets (-124) and Montréal Canadiens (+104) collide on November 17, 2025, in a matchup that’s less “hockey thriller” and more “medical drama.” Let’s break this down with the precision of a surgeon (who also happens to juggle pucks for fun).
Odds & Implied Probabilities: The Math of Misery
Columbus is favored at -124, implying a 55.1% chance to win. Montréal’s +104 line gives them 49.5%, but the math doesn’t add up cleanly—thanks to the bookmakers’ vigorish. The total is 6.5 goals, with the over as the consensus pick. Why? Both teams have combined for over 6.5 goals in 18 of their last 20 games (Columbus: 7/10, Montréal: 11/14). It’s like a fireworks show where everyone’s invited to bring sparklers.
Injury Reports: A Who’s Who of Absenteeism
Columbus is missing Erik Gudbranson (hip) and Boone Jenner (upper body), but their depth is… depthy. Meanwhile, Montréal is playing with one hand tied behind their back (and the other in a cast). Key absences include:
- Kirby Dach (broken foot, 4-6 weeks): The Canadiens’ offensive spark plug, now reduced to kicking a puck around his living room.
- Patrik Laine (lower body): The “Laine Train” is delayed indefinitely.
- Alexander Newhook (ankle): He’s probably ankle-deep in regret.
Montréal’s injury list reads like a grocery list for a “Survivor” contestant: “Don’t forget the crutches and painkillers.” Columbus? They’re just… eh. Their power play is the NHL’s version of a toddler trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube (30th in the league), but their penalty kill is a fortress (90% in 10 games).
Recent Form: The Canadiens Are a Team in Descent
Montréal has lost five of six games, including a three-game skid where they were outscored 15-3. Their last win? A 4-1 drubbing of Utah on November 8—Utah, people! Meanwhile, Columbus has earned points in four straight games but stumbled in a shootout against the Rangers. They’re two points out of a wild-card spot, playing with the desperation of a man who just realized his Netflix password is “password123.”
The Over/Under: A Goal-Fest Waiting to Happen
Both teams give up goals like a piñata at a party. Columbus allows 6.5 goals per game on average, and Montréal’s defense looks like a sieve that’s been upgraded to a colander. With the total set at 6.5, bet on the over as if your bank account depends on it—because it might.
Prediction: Blue Jackets Win, But Not Without Drama
Columbus’ penalty kill will stymie Montréal’s fractured attack, and the Canadiens’ missing stars leave them with the scoring power of a sleep-deprived sloth. However, Columbus’ power play might score once—just to mock the odds. Final score? Columbus 4, Montréal 3.
Why?
- Columbus’ penalty kill (90%) will suffocate Montréal’s disjointed offense.
- The Canadiens’ injury-riddled lineup lacks the pop to light the lamp against a Blue Jackets team that’s “due.”
- The over? Seven goals, baby. Seven.
Final Verdict: Bet the Blue Jackets (-124) and the over (6.5). Unless you’re a glutton for punishment, in which case, root for a 10-9 shootout. Your call.
“Hockey is 90% luck and 10% skill. Today, Columbus has the dice loaded.” — Your Humble Sportswriter, Who Once Scored a Hat Trick in a Video Game on Easy Mode
Created: Nov. 17, 2025, 6:09 p.m. GMT