Prediction: New Orleans Pelicans VS Memphis Grizzlies 2025-10-22

Grizzlies vs. Pelicans: A Medical Marvel Meets a Zion-Driven Reboot
By Your Favorite Sports Comedian Who Also Knows Math

Parse the Odds: A Numbers Game of Injuries
The Memphis Grizzlies enter this season opener as -190 favorites, implying a 65.7% chance to win. The Pelicans, at +160, suggest bookmakers only give them a 38.5% shot. But let’s not let numbers fool us—this is less of a “Grizzlies vs. Pelicans” game and more of a “Grizzlies: The Injured Edition” vs. “Zion’s Summer Camp Graduation.”

The spread? Memphis is favored by 4.5 points, but with eight key players sidelined (including starting center Zach Edey and Ja Morant, who missed preseason with an ankle sprain), this line smells like a “buy low” opportunity for New Orleans. The total is 236.5, a number so high it makes you think both teams will play 48 minutes of 3-point shooting contests… or that the oddsmakers forgot Memphis’ roster is basically a medical convention.

Digest the News: A Roster of Rookies and Reluctant Therapists
Memphis Grizzlies:
- Injury Carousel: Edey (ankle surgery), Pippen Jr. (toe), Clarke (knee), Jerome (calf)—it’s like the Grizzlies drafted a team of orthopedic surgeons.
- Ja and Jaren: Both starters are available but missed preseason. Morant’s ankle sprain? “A minor inconvenience,” per Iisalo. Jaren Jackson’s toe procedure? “He’s fine! He’s fine! … Probably.”
- Rookie Relief: Second-round pick Javon Small (34 points in preseason? More like 34 questions about his ACL) gets a starting role. Congrats, Javon! You’re now the face of a $200 million franchise.

New Orleans Pelicans:
- Zion’s Return: Zion Williamson, the human highlight reel, is healthy after missing 67% of his career games. Coach Willie Green calls his summer workouts “inspirational”—which is code for “he didn’t set any fire alarms off this time.”
- Dejounte Murray’s Absence: The Pelicans are without their floor general, but with Zion and Jordan Poole (yes, that Jordan Poole) sharing the ball like it’s group project night, chaos is inevitable.
- Rookie Spark: Jeremiah Fears, a first-rounder who averaged 18 points in the final preseason games, is here to “bring energy.” Translation: He’ll either dominate or become a meme. Meme potential is high.

Humorous Spin: Why This Game Feels Like a Sitcom Pilot
- Memphis’ Depth: The Grizzlies’ injury report reads like a Yelp review for a hospital. They’re playing with a lineup that includes “Javon Small (34 points in two games? More like 34 existential crises).”
- Zion’s Comeback: Zion is healthy, which is either a miracle or a PR stunt. Imagine him dunking so hard the Pelicans’ logo on the court cracks. Plot twist: The court sues them.
- The Spread: Memphis is -4.5? That line assumes Ja Morant will play 36 minutes and drop 30. But with his ankle and the Grizzlies’ bench, it’s more like “Ja plays 24 minutes, then the team shoots 28% from deep while Javon Small tries to explain quantum physics to the defense.”

Prediction: The Pelicans’ “Unlikely” Upset
Let’s crunch the absurdity:
- Memphis’ implied win probability (65.7%) assumes their injured roster functions like a Swiss watch. It does not.
- Zion’s 24.7 PPG average (despite missing 268 games) is either a statistical fluke or a reminder that “talent” isn’t always “availability.”
- The Pelicans’ +160 line is a bargain if you think Memphis’ “silver lining” (young players gaining experience) is more like a fog machine at a funeral.

Final Verdict: Bet the Pelicans moneyline. Memphis is a favorite in name only, and New Orleans’ healthier roster—led by Zion, who’s basically a superhero without a cape—has the edge.

Final Score Prediction: New Orleans 118, Memphis 115. Ja Morant hits a game-tying 3 at the buzzer, but the Grizzlies’ bench celebrates like they won the lottery.

“The Pelicans are the underdog story of the season… until Zion rolls his ankle in Game 2.” — Your Humorously Pessimistic Analyst

Created: Oct. 22, 2025, 5:19 p.m. GMT

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