Prediction: South Carolina St Bulldogs VS Charleston Southern Buccaneers 2025-12-08
Charleston Southern vs. South Carolina State: A Lopsided Lobotomy
Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for a basketball mismatch so stark, itās like watching a debate between a philosopher and a toaster. The Charleston Southern Buccaneers (6-5) host the South Carolina State Bulldogs (0-9) on Monday, December 8, 2025, and if you thought this game was a toss-up, letās clarify: itās not. Itās a lobotomy.
Parse the Odds: Why This Is a Math Problem, Not a Game
Charleston Southern isnāt just favoredātheyāre implied to win by 9-10 points per bookmaker, with odds hovering around 1.2 (implying an 83% chance to win). For context, thatās the statistical confidence of someone betting on the sun rising. The Bulldogs, meanwhile, are priced at 4.5-4.75, which translates to a 18-21% chance. If youāre confused, donāt worryāso would the Bulldogsā defense, which allows 88.7 points per game. Thatās worse than a sieve full of Swiss cheese.
Key stats? Charleston Southernās offense is a well-oiled machine: they shoot 44.1% from the field, lead the Big South in offensive rebounds (11.3 per game), and average 84.1 points per contest. South Carolina State? They score 65.7 PPG (349th nationally) and allow 23 more points per game than they muster. The Buccaneersā three-point defense (49.8% allowed) is friendlier than a campfire songāSouth Carolinaās 30.7% shooting from deep would make a rock feel skilled by comparison.
Digest the News: Injuries, Momentum, and a Touch of Tragedy
Recent results paint an even grimmer picture for the Bulldogs. Charleston Southern just smoked Warren Wilson 124-63, with Armari Carraway dropping 36 points like confetti at a parade. Meanwhile, South Carolina State lost to Bethune-Cookman 80-59, with their lone bright spot being Chris Parkerās 14 points (a meager spark in a forest fire).
Injuries? The Bulldogsā āinjury reportā might as well be a Whoās Who of bad luck. Their starting backcourt, Obie Bronston Jr. (13 PPG) and Noah Treadwell (9.0 PPG), combined for 22 points against Bethune-Cookmanāenough to power a smartphone for a day. On the bright side, Brycen Blaine (20.3 PPG, 7.9 RPG, 4 APG for Charleston) is as healthy as a golden retriever in a tennis ball factory.
Humorous Spin: Why This Game Is a Foregone Conclusion
Letās be real: South Carolina Stateās offense is like a deflated balloon at a partyāpresent, but useless. Their 0-9 record isnāt a streak; itās aęØę·” comedy routine. Imagine their defense: a team that surrenders 88.7 PPG is essentially a bouncer who lets in everyone, including the guy who forgot his ID and a 5-foot-tall midget named āBig Tony.ā
Charleston Southern, meanwhile, is the bouncerās opposite. Their home court, The Buc Dome, is a fortress where theyāve yet to lose. With Reis Jones grabbing 2.0 offensive rebounds per game (and a personality as tenacious as a squirrel guarding a nut), the Buccaneers turn missed shots into second chancesālike a buffet where ānoā isnāt on the menu.
And letās not forget Armari Carraway, who dropped 36 points in their last win. If basketball had a āMost Likely to Be a Solo Starā award, heād be the principal.
Prediction: A Free Throw for the Bucs
This isnāt a gameāitās a masterclass. Charleston Southernās +72 scoring differential vs. South Carolina Stateās -210 (approximate, but you get the point) gap is the sports equivalent of a cat chasing a laser. The only question is whether the total (153.5) will be hitāprobably not, since the Bulldogsā offense is about as explosive as a wet spaghetti noodle.
Final Verdict: Bet on Charleston Southern to win by double digits, then cash your ticket and laugh all the way to the laundromat where the Bulldogsā hopes are getting a spin cycle.
āThe only thing South Carolina State has going for them is a 9-game losing streak⦠and maybe a really good motivational speaker.ā
Created: Dec. 8, 2025, 4:20 p.m. GMT